AND THE AWARD GOES TO…

For as long as I can remember, I have loved watching the Oscars. When I was a child my parents used to make us Oscar parties, which basically meant unlimited sparkling apple cider and mini hot dogs. In high school, I was a movie fanatic and had always seen all of the nominated movies by Christmas. I love watching for the fashion, to see the stars mingling on the red carpet, and of course to hear what nasty things Joan Rivers has to say.

After this year’s nominees were announced, I realized something very depressing. I had not had a chance to see even one of the movies that had been nominated. I know I'll eventually get around to viewing them all, but for now I have to live with the fact that finding two consecutive hours to watch an entire movie is no easy feat. While I may not be an expert on the best films of 2012 (next year I will do better), I thought this would be a good time to give out some of my own awards for the best things I have come across this year as a parent.

 

And the award goes to…  

 

FAVORITE BOOK ABOUT BULLYING: One by Kathryn Otoshi
We received this book as a present from friends over the holidays and it makes me smile every time I read it. There are many ways to teach a child to stick up for others who are being bullied, but this is one of the more unique approaches that I have come across. Plus, as an added bonus I get to sneak in a little color/number lesson for my ten-month old.

 

EASIEST WAY FOR NEW MOMS TO EXERCISE: Stroller Strides
I joined Stroller Strides thinking that this would be a group of moms taking a casual stroll through the park, but in actuality this is a hardcore workout for moms who want to get their bodies back. The kids sit and watch from their strollers while their moms get the chance to burn off calories without having to find a babysitter. Find a class near you.

 

BEST WAY TO GET TODDLERS TO EAT THEIR OATMEAL: Quaker Dinosaur Eggs
Getting my three-year old to eat new foods can be a challenge at times, but if the food is shaped like a dinosaur somehow it becomes magically appealing. And tell him that dinosaur eggs are actually hatching in his cereal, and all of a sudden he can’t get enough of his oatmeal.

 

FAVORITE CARTOON: Doc McStuffins
This is a really cute show about a young girl who runs a little toy hospital in her backyard. She’s never met a toy she couldn’t fix, and she seems to accept everyone's insurance. Read my previous blog about my other favorite television shows for kids.

 

MOST ENTERTAINING BOARD GAME: Richard Scarry’s Busytown
A fun version of I-Spy that even I enjoy playing with my three-year old. All of the players are working towards the same goal, so there is an added lesson of teamwork. Intended for ages 3 and up.

 

BEST CLOTHING STORE: Carters

In the end, nothing beats Carters when it comes to affordable, well-made children’s clothes. The best part is that my kids seem to fit into the intended sizes. (Do anyone else’s children outgrow Ralph Lauren clothing really quickly?!)

 

BEST TOY FOR TEETHERS: Sophie the Giraffe

Yes, it’s overpriced. But not overhyped. For some reason my ten-month old loves this rubber giraffe.

 

BEST SHOW ABOUT PARENTHOOD:  Parenthood

I don’t know if I’d go so far as to say this is the best show I’ve ever watched (it's not even my favorite show that has starred Lauren Graham), but it might be the best assembled group of actors I’ve ever seen in a television show. You are guaranteed to alternate between laughter and tears every single episode.

 

FAVORITE CHILDREN’S MOVIE: Follow That Bird
I’m not sure how many times I watched this on the VCR as a child, but I think I knew every word by heart. Just don’t let your child see the new DVD cover because for some reason they put Elmo on it, and they may be disappointed to learn that Elmo hadn’t even been created yet. (Why would they do that? Isn’t a movie with Big Bird and Sandra Bernhard enough to get the kids excited these days?)

 

BIGGEST WASTE OF TIME FOR NEW PARENTS: Learning to swaddle

For some reason one of the things I was most nervous about before becoming a new mom was the fact that my swaddling skills were less than perfect. Then I got one of these and I soon realized that my time could have been much better spent worrying about all of the other things that are scary about becoming a new parent, like not having enough time to watch movies once the baby arrives.

HOMELAND CHARACTERS ARE JUST LIKE TODDLERS

Usually I am way ahead of the curve when it comes to watching the best shows on television, but for some reason I jumped on the Homeland bandwagon really late. In fact, my husband and I are not even finished with Season Two, so no spoilers please! While watching Homeland I couldn’t help but think that these characters seemed awfully familiar. Then I realized why; they all have their moments of acting just like toddlers.

Here are the top twelve ways Homeland characters are just like toddlers:

1.    Carrie doesn’t understand the meaning of the word ‘no’…

2.    …or the meaning of the word ‘privacy’.

3.    Brody keeps putting the blame for things he’s done wrong on someone else.

4.    Remember the scene when Carrie tortures the bad guy by waking him up every five minutes from a deep sleep? This method of torture should sound pretty familiar to most every parent out there.

5.    David Estes pouts a lot when he doesn’t get his way.

6.    Brody’s favorite hiding spot is under a rock.

7.    Saul doesn’t like taking orders from anyone.

8.    Carrie often turns to the bottle when she needs soothing.

9.    Mike and Brody aren’t very good at sharing.

10. Carrie can entertain herself for days playing with her colored highlighters.

11. When left on his own, Saul chooses to eat peanut butter from a jar for dinner.

12. Carrie’s ugly cry is similar to a two-year old’s ugly cry.

MOM-MEH LIST

Inspired by The New York Times Magazine's weekly Meh List, I decided I would put together my own Mom-meh List. Here are the ten things that I deem to be "meh" this week:

1. Fish Sticks
2. Colored bubbles
3. Sesame Place
4. Belly Bars
5. Tickety-Toc
6. Silly Putty
7. Angry Birds Space
8. Bundle Me blankets
9. Candy Canes
10. Stretch mark removal cream

What would be on your Mom-meh List?

THE ART OF SHARING

Last week, Al Roker informed the world that he had pooped his pants during a previous visit to the White House. My initial reaction to this confession was one of pure horror. Couldn’t Al find something a little less offensive to chat about while promoting his book? Couldn’t he talk about something less vulgar, like maybe the weather?! But upon further reflection, I realized that he should be admired for his audacious overshare. Celebrities are always pretending to be divulging private information by admitting to their secret cravings for potato chips or their fondness for the Real Housewives, but Al Roker’s confession was a bit more jaw-dropping than that. And guess what? By next week, everyone will have moved on to the next story. And maybe the next time someone poops their pants at the White House, they won’t feel so bad.
 

I have a dirty little secret to share with you as well. I happen to hate talking about myself. I know what you’re thinking: starting a blog was a great idea! The truth is, while it hasn’t felt entirely natural to share personal tidbits about my life, it has been a lot of fun. As a new year begins, I’ve been pondering what to write about and what people even care to read about. Should I discuss how I finally started watching Homeland and divulge who I’ve developed a strange crush on? Do you care what foods my children refuse to eat? Should I talk about why I cried on New Year’s Eve? Or how many times have I fallen off the exercise bike since my first spin class?

Personally, I enjoy reading the random things people share in their blogs and on Facebook. I joined Facebook a few months after my first son was born, and for me it was a little bit of a lifesaver. The first couple of months of motherhood can be a lonely time, especially when you’ve only recently moved to the suburbs and feel overwhelmed by the mere notion of trekking to the drug store with an infant in tow, let alone getting out of the house and meeting other new moms. Facebook reconnected me with the outside world and made me feel just a little less alone. It turned out I wasn’t the only one who had been pooped on! (By my infant, not by Al Roker.) I wasn’t the only one who had been awake since 4am! Yes, teething is torture! (And I can only imagine what it’s like for the baby…) The more mundane the posts, the more I rejoiced. Other people were experiencing the same magnificent/terrifying/revolting aspects of parenthood that I was. And it wasn’t just the parenting posts I craved. I loved hearing about friends’ nights out drinking, eating elaborate meals, and viewing movies in actual movie theaters.

I guess I’m hoping that reading about my sometimes humorous and oftentimes ordinary experiences in motherhood might make another new parent feel a little less lonely. As I think about what to write about next, I can promise you that I will never be sharing a story about pooping my pants at the White House (I know what you’re thinking: you would never be invited to the White House!) For now this will have to suffice: Saul and Brody (both disconcerting for different reasons), my older son doesn’t like tomato sauce and my younger one still won’t touch green beans, none of your business, and I haven’t fallen off any stationery bikes lately, thank you very much.

MAN'S BEST FRIEND, MOM'S WORST NIGHTMARE

I have already confessed that I am not thrilled with Halloween, so I might as well admit something else that you may judge me for: I never plan on getting a dog. I think this admission surprised my husband, since I also happen to love dogs. I am especially fond of my parents’ adorable toy poodle, Winnie the Poodle, who I have had a special bond with ever since she decided to become my fervent protector during my first pregnancy, and has been loyal to me ever since.

Here is the pros/cons list that led me to this conclusion:

 PROS FOR DOG OWNERSHIP

      ·         Having a consistently faithful and loving companion.

·         Someone to cuddle with on the couch when you’re watching Hart of Dixie and no one (i.e. your husband) else will go near you.

·         Pets teach children valuable lessons of responsibility and commitment.

·         Less need to drag out the dustbuster after your toddler finishes dinner; just let the dog have at the leftovers (there have been a few meals where I’ve considered whether moving would be easier than tackling the mess on the floor).

·         You are forced to get exercise every day even if you don’t want to leave the house.

·         Walking the dog allows you to meet neighbors and gives you an excuse to explore your neighborhood.

 

CONS FOR DOG OWNERSHIP

·         You have to wake up really early in the morning to care for them and pick up their poop.

 I didn’t always feel this way. About four years ago I asked a couple of close friends if they would accompany me to a local shelter to pick out a puppy for my husband’s upcoming birthday. We set a date to meet the following Saturday. That Friday I took a pregnancy test. Thirty seconds later I called my doctor to tell her that I was pregnant. She congratulated me and instructed me to set up an appointment.

“Okay. In the meantime, I just have a couple of quick questions. Is it bad that I ate lobster last week when I was in Maine? Have I been on my prenatal vitamins long enough? Is it normal to already feel queasy? Should I take a couple more tests just to make sure? What foods should I avoid? Is it crazy that I already have to pee a lot? I read on the internet that I should avoid hair dryers, is this true?!”

“You are not allowed to go on the internet until your next appointment,” my doctor informed me.

Suddenly, I remembered one more issue that needed to be addressed.

“I was planning on getting a dog for my husband’s birthday next week. Can I still go ahead and do that?” My doctor advised me to wait until after the pregnancy to make a purchase of this magnitude. After all, this was my first pregnancy and I had never owned a dog before. Who was I to argue?

And here we are, four years later, with two boys but still no dog. I have now had the privilege of being pooped on and peed on, I have braved potty training, I have endured the massive planning that goes into taking a vacation without your kids, and I have been repeatedly woken up at all hours of the night. The only thing that gets me through these obstacles is that it’s only temporary. My children will eventually both be potty trained (right?!), and perhaps in the near future will be able to entertain each other on a Saturday morning long enough to let their weary parents sleep in past 7am. Welcoming a dog to the family feels like it would be adding another child who remains a toddler forever.

Maybe one day I will change my mind. I doubt it, but it’s possible. Just don’t tell my children that. And definitely don’t tell my husband.

I AM THANKFUL FOR…

...two beautiful sons who impress me each and every day with their intelligence, sensitivity, and sense of humor.

…the rare Sunday mornings that I have free to spend at spin class and the Farmer’s Market.

…the rare Sunday afternoons that I have free to spend cuddled up on the couch with a blanket, herbal tea and a good book.

…two phenomenal parents who I know I can always count on no matter what.

…a brother and sister who also happen to be incredible friends.

…Cheerios.

…Dinosaur Egg oatmeal, Dinosaur chicken fingers, Dinosaur fruit chews…etc.

…the fact that my older son has become pickier about food, but for some reason still gobbles up my salmon.

…the fact that my younger son still eats pretty much anything I give him without complaining.

...the Dunkin Donuts drive-thru

…Parenthood (the job)

…Parenthood (the television show)

…a mother-in-law, father-in-law, two sisters-in-law and a brother-in-law who made me feel like part of the family pretty much the moment I met them.

…Date Night.

…Girl’s Night Out.

…Any Night Out.

…Lauren Graham.

 

…wonderful friends who keep me laughing no matter how tired or stressed I become.

…my husband, the most amazing life partner I could ever hope for.

 Happy Turkey Day!

AFTER THE STORM

Despite persistent weather reports that stressed the potential dangers of Hurricane Sandy, I never anticipated the overwhelming devastation and destruction that resulted from the brutal storm. For me, last week was a reminder of how life can change in an instant, and to never take what you have for granted. Since my children are too young to remember any of this, I decided to draft a letter to share a few other things I learned from the storm.

 

Dear Big Bro and Little Bro,

Take note of any advice your weathermen offer, especially if they repeat the same warnings over and over again for seven days straight.

Be persistent but patient if you are feeling ignored in the aftermath of a storm. There will be many people who are affected in ways both big and small, and while a few might not be pulling their weight in recovery efforts, most will be working around the clock to help and there will just not be enough hands to help everyone at once.

There will be a few select stories that the media will run in a continuous loop. These stories are important but don’t forget about those who may not be shown on television but are also in need of relief and donations.

Fill up the gas tank of your car before the storm arrives. Don’t question it, just trust me.

If you’re one of the few who didn’t lose power, don’t watch a show called Revolution. Don’t question it, just trust me.

If the storm happens around Halloween, expect trick-or-treating to be rescheduled nine times before it actually happens. Do not tell your three-year old that he will be going trick-or-treating until five minutes before you’re planning on leaving. Unless you want to disappoint your three-year old eight different times.

Make sure you always have a few good books and a flashlight by your nightstand.

Don’t underestimate how quickly Bruce Springsteen, Jon Bon Jovi and Billy Joel can pull together a benefit concert to help.

Get a land line in case you lose power.

If you have a massage scheduled the day before the biggest storm of the century is about to strike, you do not have to reschedule (even if you get a call from your grandmother telling you otherwise). But you do have to go to the store to stock up beforehand.

Don’t just stock up on food for your immediate family. Buy enough for your entire extended family plus any friends who may lose power. Also, always have enough peanut butter in the house. That will always be the first shelf emptied out in the supermarket before a storm.  

Don’t assume that Andy Cohen will have cancelled his live show just because there is a live hurricane outside his clubhouse.

If you lose faith, take a moment to look around you. You may be inspired, like I was, to witness people who are suffering take the time to assist those who have suffered even more.

Love,

Mom